Thursday, September 24, 2015

Lurve and Tang: A True Story

I've been kind of sappy and nostalgic and emotional these last few days, which definitely isn't my baseline. I thought maybe it was because life has been so crazy lately, but really, except for the real estate transaction bonanza, it's not a whole lot crazier than it has been for the last three-to-five years. Then it occurred to me that for the first time in over 20 years, my hormones are actually my own. They are not at the mercy of chemical birth control or tiny humans growing in my belly. And I'm not sure how I feel about it! Is this that "PMS" that everyone has been talking about? Yowza. You people weren't joking around.

Anyway, in light of my recent state of sap, and cleaning and sorting things for the impending move, here's a mini retrospective on my love. Sometimes it's nice to be reminded why you married someone, especially at those times in your life when you've recently argued about a mop.

First, I came across one of our wedding programs. On one side were the lyrics to Bob Dylan's "Wedding Song," which I love to this day:

...You're the other half of what I am
You're the missing piece
And I love you more than ever
With a love that doesn't cease...

And on the other side was this letter:

Dear Mom and L -

A lot has happened in ten years, and I wish you'd been here to experience every minute of the wild ride. I grew up. Sorta. I'm not a trainer for the 'Niners, but a lawyer instead. It still sounds funny to say that. But I love my work. I do good (and medium-well ;)), and I learn something new each day. Little Brother is headed into his senior year of high school... no longer a little kid that falls asleep amidst a sea of markers and crayons, but an (almost) man with big ideas about how to turn those markers and crayons (and paints and pens) into an exciting future. Little Sister is married, and she's a MOM!!! I can't get used to that either! But it's an incredible thing... your first grandbaby!

My favorite story to tell, however, is this:

I met a boy. And I loooooove him. And the best part is, I know you would, too. He's smart and he's handsome and he's funny (but don't tell him I said so :)). He likes adventures. He makes great margaritas. And he makes me smile every single day. I feel so lucky, not only that he and I found each other, but also that I was fortunate enough to get plenty of lessons in love from the two of you. Thank you for teaching me that friendship and laughter and silliness are just as essential to a relationship as commitment and strength. Thank you for teaching me that true love doesn't fit in a box, and can't be captured by words. And thank you for providing inspiration and encouragement in love and all of life's endeavors over the years.

I'd like to think of the two of you here today, in Tahoe, where I always feel your spirits so strongly. I imagine you at the top of one of these peaks, tired and happy and completely content after a long day's hike, setting up camp and preparing a feast of Tang and re-constituted Chinese chicken salad. After dinner you settle in around the fire with your books or a deck of cards, but as the sun begins to set, you take a few minutes to watch the festivities.

You hear music and laughter wafting up the mountain.

You see family and friends dancing the night away.

It's almost as if you're right there.

It's almost as if you're right here.

Miss you.

Love you.

- M.

Then, I came across this little convo between DM and me, probably from a month or two ago:

Me: You're my fave. Thank you for helping out with our lives so much lately. I just can't seem to get ahold of the reins.
Him: We are a team. You only need one rein. I got the other one. Sometimes. And sometimes it's okay for us to be a runaway wagon.
Me: Well thank you. You are a good partner. I don't know if I'll ever grab hold of that second rein again.
Him: That's okay. I like a wild ride :)

As my grandma likes to say, "Hang on tight and don't stand up!"


  1. Your mom and L would have argued over the mop too. Heard a talk once... mushy talk, one good point. The opposite of love isn't hate... it's indifference. Worry when there isn't enough passion to fuel an occasional argument. Uncle P

    1. Agreed! I remember them bickering over silly stuff plenty, but the only real big argument S and I ever witnessed was over whether or not baby T should be wearing a sweater. Ha. Luckily, Mr. L and The Hubs are much alike in that they usually let us win the arguments ;)