Friday, October 14, 2016

N to the mother-effing OPE

If you live here on planet earth you may have already heard this one before, but do me a favor. Just for shits and giggles. Read this out loud:

I did try and fuck her. She was married....I moved on her like a bitch. But I couldn’t get there.... Then all of a sudden I see her, she’s now got the big phony tits and everything. She’s totally changed her look.... Yeah, that’s her. With the gold. I better use some Tic Tacs just in case I start kissing her. You know, I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything.... Grab ’em by the pussy. You can do anything.

Read it to your mother, your wife, your daughter, your sister, your female friend. Ask her how it makes her feel. Ask her if it reminds her of the time (there almost certainly was one - at least one) when someone "grabbed her by the pussy" or manhandled her "big phony tits" or tried to shove his slimy hands up her skirt. Ask her how she felt in that moment when a stranger, or a coworker, a boss, or a friend, decided that this woman's (or girl's) body was not her own, not really. That he was entitled to grab and grope and poke at her body like a piece of meat wrapped in flimsy plastic at the supermarket. Ask her how it feels to be on the receiving end of a creepy, horny man who has no qualms using his power and position to demean, degrade, and defile you for his amusement. As though it is a game.

(I was recently talking, with a man, about the high school daughter of his friend who was sexually assaulted, and whether they should report it to the authorities. I asked, "What level of sexual assault are we talking about?" Him: There are levels? Me: Yeah, I think every woman I know has technically been sexually assaulted, including myself. But I've never called the police or anything. Him: What do you mean by sexually assaulted? Me: You know, like guys grabbing my boobs or my ass [him nodding like, okay, sure, not ideal but probably not worth calling the police], or, you know, trying to shove their fingers in my vagina... Him: [Record screetch, freeze frame.])

Yeah. That. 

Read it to your son, and tell him how it would make you feel, as his mother or father, if you heard him speaking this way about women. THIS IS HOW THE BROCK TURNERS OF THE WORLD GET MADE, PEOPLE! Normalizing this type of behavior, writing it off as "boys will be boys." F. That. Not my boy. Not on my watch.

Or, hey, here's an idea - read it to ANY DECENT HUMAN BEING. Even penis-carrying members of society can and should be PISSED OFF right now.

Can someone please explain to me how anyone can defend this man???

If you dismiss it as "locker room banter," saying this is "just the way guys talk," you hang out with shitty humans. Either that, or you are one.

"Sex talk" is not the same as "sexual assault talk." It's not the fact that he's talking about her tits and pussy. It's the fact that he thinks he's entitled to grab her genitals without her consent because he's a "star" (in what galaxy I do not know) and he can "do anything."

I've never read Fifty Shades of Grey but I assume any attempt to excuse DJT's behavior on that basis isn't worth the minimal amount of brain cells it would take to refute it. Again, there's a BIG difference between kinky, consensual sex, up to and including BDSM, and SEXUALLY ASSAULTING SOMEONE. "Sexual assault is a crime of power and control. The term sexual assault refers to sexual contact or behavior that occurs without explicit consent of the victim." (Emphasis added.)

If your defense starts with the words "Bill Clinton..." Stop right there. 

First, just because Bill Clinton is also a creeper doesn't make what Donald Trump did okay. And, for the record, Donald Trump has said himself that what he's done with/to women is even worse than what Bill Clinton has.

I personally didn't vote for Bill Clinton (because I was 12 and 16 when he was elected and re-elected). Knowing what we know now, yeah, the guy is not a paragon of morality, at least in his interactions with the female species. But he isn't a hate-mongering bigot so he has that going for him. Also? This was before Al Gore invented the internet, remember, and prior to the advent of the 24 hour news cycle. But when it did come out (Lewinsky, the Paula Jones stuff) - it was a big freakin' deal. Remember that whole thing about how (a bunch of hypocrite) Republicans impeached Bill Clinton for his indiscretions and lying under oath? But hey, pin an elephant on the lapel of a serial womanizer and pathological liar and you are good to go!

Side note: Doesn't it seem like, as a society, we have aggressively lowered the bar on what is acceptable public behavior, both in and out of the White House? I mean, remember Watergate? If that happened nowadays people would be like, Duh, of course he bugged the DNC headquarters! Bill Clinton's biggest pre-election scandal was that he had smoked pot but hadn't inhaled. George W. Bush admitted to doing coke. Obama smoked cigarettes (yucky). I feel like at this point Donald J. Trump could say he snorted meth from a hooker's bleached asshole and no one would bat an eye. (You're welcome for that mental picture.) 

Finally, and most importantly, Bill Clinton is not running for President of the United States of America. 

We can get into a conversation another day about why strong, brilliant, successful women stay with philandering douche bonnets. But let me tell you this - when today's little girls grow up with a strong woman in the oval office, we'll be a little bit closer to a society where men and women really are equal, where the Brock Turners and Donald Trumps of the world cannot flourish, cannot use their power, their reality television fame, their daddy's money, their white entitlement, to thrust their fumbling dipsticks into our various orifices and get away with a fake apology and a slap on the wrist.

Aaaaand another thing - I find it extremely ironic that the same hand-wringing right wing conservatives who pushed for passage of the "Bathroom Bills" because they were SO CONCERNED that our defenseless little lady folk would be attacked by sexual predators wearing dresses in the ladies room (based on a sum total of zero evidence, by the way), are A-OKAY electing a man who LAUGHS ABOUT SEXUALLY ASSAULTING WOMEN to RUN THE ENTIRE NATION. Seriously. Explain it to me like a two-year old because I'm having a hard time wrapping my mind around this.

Did I ever tell you I used to work for the firm suing Cheeto Hitler in the Trump University case? I'd seen some deposition footage and spoken with colleagues about it and he seemed like a rich entitled prick but when he first came onto the political scene I didn't think he was as awful as he seemed. I mean, I didn't want him to be president, obviously, or even CEO of Walmart. But I thought he was just acting like a racist cockwaffle to appeal to his base. I didn't think he was actually a bigoted sociopathic predator, you know? I guess that's what people always say about psychopaths, right up until the point where you find human heads in their freezer. 

A friend of ours coaches baseball and has instituted a 24-hour rule with respect to parents emailing him to bitch about the game. If your panties are still in a rumple 24 hours later, then you can write. I feel the same way about blogging. I like to sleep on it for a bit and see. But believe you me, my panties are still rumpled RIGHT UP. Also made of kevlar. And outfitted with those electric zapper things to stun unwanted intruders. Maybe you'll say I'm beating a dead horse, or wasting my breath because I'm not going to change anyone's mind. That may be true. Honestly, when I sat down in front of the computer to press "Publish," I just felt so tired, and I thought to myself, "Why? Who even cares? What difference are me and my tiny soap box in an echo chamber going to make?" And then I started thinking about it again and I'm not tired anymore, I'm MAD. I cannot, in good conscience, sit in silence while this narcissistic sociopath in a squirrel hat threatens to terrorize my country.

I seriously just do not understand how real, relatively-normal-seeming human beings can try to justify this shit stain of a man, like, period, let alone in the role of commander in chief? I was ranting to my husband about this the other day (well, okay, every day). He works for a human rights organization most ultra-conservatives think is the Antichrist, but is maddeningly reasonable, and he said "Just because you're a Trump supporter doesn't mean you're a terrible person." Maybe he's right. But I am really starting to wonder. It's good in a way though, to see a human face on a Trump supporter, as opposed to some kind of Darth Maul situation like I see in my mind's eye. It reminds me - in a giant neon red danger flag type of way - that a Trump presidency is an actual (if, hopefully, increasingly remote) possibility, and I need to do my tiny part to make sure it doesn't happen.

By the way, Republicans, you do not have to vote for this guy. No one is "forcing your hand," literally or otherwise, to cast a vote for this simpering scumbag. This is not North F*^#$% Korea. Yay democracy! That is one good thing we still do have going for us. (Though according to my crotchety old Uncle Jim, democracy actually wasn't meant for stupid people. Make of that what you will.)

I just do not understand casting aside your ethics, ideals, and gut instincts in blind allegiance to a party that chose this ignorant puppet to represent it (but not the kind of puppet that does what you want it to, more like the possessed kind that tries to kill you, or grab your vagina, in your sleep.) By the way, this guy isn't even a Republican, really, and he damn sure ain't a Christian, for those who care about that kind of thing. In any event, he is the leader of a party that is frantically bailing water on a rapidly sinking ship. And hey, if your excuses and justifications let you sleep at night, well, then, that makes one of us. But you are the dance band on the Titanic, my friend. Please just don't bring the rest of the country down with you.

I actually despise bumper stickers. I think they're so tacky and I never considered tainting my sweet-ass mom-ride with one until this election season. Desperate times call for desperate measures, right? Anyway, I had this bumper sticker that said "Not A Republican." I thought that was pretty damn pithy, if you must know. Then. Some fucking pussy (see what I did there) snuck under cover of darkness and put a sticker over the "Not A" part so that it just said "Republican." Objectively clever, I suppose. But I do not respond well to threats. See Exhibit A, below.
How you like me NOW?!
If You Vote For Trump Then Screw You - Drew Magary, GQ

Michelle Obama on Trump's Latest Disgraceful Debacle (video) “And I have to tell you that I can’t stop thinking about this. It has shaken me to my core in a way that I couldn’t have predicted."

Trevor Noah on The Daily Show - Fallout from the PussyGate Scandal, aka, Scumbag Millionaire (video)

Samantha B - Pussy Riot (video) She's my new hero.

Trump, the GOP, and the Fall - John Scalzi, Whatever

Notable endorsements of Not Trump:

The State of Alabama! "Endorsement: We're with Hillary Clinton. Frankly, Donald Trump's Dangerous."

The Arizona Republic: Since The Arizona Republic began publication in 1890, we have never endorsed a Democrat over a Republican for president. Never. This reflects a deep philosophical appreciation for conservative ideals and Republican principles. This year is different. The 2016 Republican candidate is not conservative and he is not qualified. That’s why, for the first time in our history, The Arizona Republic will support a Democrat for president. (They received death threats for this, by the way.)

The Atlantic: First endorsement in 52 years

The Cincinnati Enquirer: First endorsement of a Democrat in 100 years

The Columbus Dispatch: first endorsement of a Democrat in 100 years

The Dallas Morning News: First endorsement of a Democrat in 76 years

The Detroit News: First endorsement of a non-Republican (Gary Johnson)

Foreign Policy: First endorsement in 46 years

The San Diego Union Tribune: First endorsement of a Democrat in its 148 year history

USA Today: First "disendorsement" in its entire 34 year history

See also, Mother Jones' running tally of newspaper endorsements

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